Tea for two

Feigning female ailments secured a day to myself. My keeper would believe I was with the physician, the physician would believe I was with my keeper.

It is not difficulty to acquire things in the district. For all the locks, bars and assortments of barriers to prevent loss people are quite lax with their belongings. A robe of yellow and white was snatched from the line it was left to dry on. Some little wisp would carry the marks of her oversight as I drew it on. Layers of veils easily shielded my face as I found Wessick's house. Lady Olivieta met me at the door, so pleased to see me. Her mate was in the library. It had become his fortress to escape the shrieking of his shrew companion. I was more than glad to close the door leaving the barrage of her insessant demands on the other side.

It is not sex that a lonely man truly wishes for. Wessick's hunger was simply for quiet conversation, understanding, genteel entertainment. The day was spent offering him a banquet. We shared kalana instead of bazi tea, discussing whatever came to mind and laughter often filled the little study. He was delighted to rise and join me in a dance. One that was dear to his heart, one that was practiced by his people but never allowed in his own home at his mate's fierce request. Today, he stood strong. He ushered her away, silencing her protests firmly. He would have what he wanted and she would be silent about it. He stood taller, the staueque epitome of a man's virility. When I wrapped him in my arms, his eyes widened with surprise. The stiletto blade had slid easily between two ribs to pierce the balloon sac of a lung and the withering organ of his heart. He thought he had found his miseries saviour only to feel it slipping through the fissure in a slickened ooze. It was a delicate smile that met him, reassuring that all would be alright. My lips surrounding his in an affectioned kiss drank in the hiss of expelled air. I helped him down to one of the thick carpets and brushed my fingers along his brow. I think he even smiled as I took his own fingertip, dipping it in the magenta stain and began to write on the hard wood flooring ... Liv

The lady of the house in her impatience burst through the door and immediately began to shriek. This was nothing that she had planned. How could I? How dare I? The demise ... yes, the method ... no. I rose to meet her. Soothing dulcet tones quieted her leaving the length of the blade extended from her stomach. She did what most do. She grasped the hilt between her hands.

It was not satisfaction. It was not remorse. It was not even insanity that brought the proud inhale and deepening smile just as I reached the door.

Once out on the street, I screamed and pointed back to the house, 'She's gone mad'

It was easy to slide into the gathering crowd of curiosity seekers.

The robe was left in a refuge heap long before I returned to the apartment. The purse of coins the woman no longer needed would be added to the collection.

tueur compatissant

It was almost closing time when the bell rang on the front door. The physician's aggravation was highly noteable as he growled at the intruder. Sorticles had plans for those few moments before I returned to the insula and the intrusion was unwelcomed. The tirade was short lived however when he saw who had entered. A centurian, obviously in distress had found his way to the healer rambling about needing a serum to reduce fever. His young daughter was close to delirium with it. The entreaties of the armed guardsman would have been compelling to someone sentimental.Such a compassionate killer. It gave me an opportunity.
My employer was shooing the uniformed soldier toward the door with murmurs that we were closed .. come back tomorrow. All that it took was a gentle rest of my hand against the emerald sleeve to quiet him. We had a few moments to spare and it would offer a few more coins. I went to find the small vial that would cure the child's ails. The soldier's gratitude spilled into the street as he held the small package like it was made of gold. I took advantage of the moment to slip between the two men and bid them both farewell for the day.
I left them both behind while I hurried along the street. I sought that niche in the cement of an alley wall to poke part of the day's earnings. Once the bits were safe, I stepped back out within the crowds. If I had been studying faces looking for one in particular it was not the one that stopped me in my tracks.
Could it be? Was it him? My mind told me the improbabilty but the intense rise of emotion .. so new to me ...washed away reasoning. I found myself calling out across the way, trying to capture his attention. So emmersed in this beckoning, I'd not noticed Jelus coming up behind me. There was no mistaking that steel clutch at my arm. The bruises now layered on my skin in a rainbow of purple to greenish yellow fades. How long had he been there? How much had he seen?
For a moment I tried to break the grasp, reaching out across time, across distance, even across impossibility for Septus, the only male that had been allowed to live ... my brother.
That disobedience, that bit of defiance would cost me dearly. That night, Jelus earned a new place at the top of my book of retribution

What we do not know cannot hurt us

?


It is not only bred slaves whose destinies are crafted from their heritage. A slave born of slaves is to become a slave. Likewise it is the same of all Goreans. The caste system determines the fate of the children. A child born of a warrior is a warrior to be from the time of its birth, as is a merchant, a scribe or even a peasant. The caste of the sire is to be the caste of the child upon reaching majority. One can change their caste only by edict of a ubar and never does one take on a lower caste than they were born to. These tenets have not changed since the creation of parchment to write them down. There may be a cornerstone somewhere that bears the chiseling of it in stone.

There is a selfish tendency of people not to ask more than what they wish to know. Racselis was a physician by birthright. He followed in his father's footsteps albeit with a strange limp that almost dragged one foot in a crippling fashion. His specialization was the breeding of pleasure slaves. That is all anyone ever cared to know. It is the point that they stopped asking questions. No one ever asked what he had desired to be, what he wanted to do when he grew up. Because of that, his passion tainted all that he touched. Unrequited love. It is not only women that have a hellacious fury when scorned.

It would have been a lowering of caste to pursue his greatest dream. A life of simplicity as a weapon's maker would have offered him peace and contentment, but that would have defied a legacy. Instead he continued with the work his father had handed down, crafting the most glorious of creatures meant to serve. In his spare time he still dappled with his hobby. Speculation had rumored that long ago in his tinkering, he had combined a potassium derivative, and another ingredients with quite exciting results. It excited the Priests enough to exile him to Acresius. No one ever asks what happens to those consumed by the blue flame. It would be beyond the World's end that he would spend the rest of his life paying restitution. There in the imposed seclusion of his laboratories, his true brilliance would surface. He would find a way to combine his profession with his desire.

poor little widow to be

Those that patronize the physician's 'shop' come in a variety of flavors and colors like candy. Within the wrappers holds delicious little treats just waiting to be devoured.

Detre was one of the copper bit kind, you can get a whole bag of them for next to nothing. He was a kanda junkie. As thin as a satarna straw from selling everything he had for 'one more fix'. He would beg, brrow or steal for his habit and more often than not it was the latter. You could find him in the alleys barebacking wealthy magistrates who wanted something scandalously different.

Twitching, ticking, constantly scratching at the imaginary itches that seemed to infest his frail body, he had come in just before midday. No sooner than the door had eased behind him he had drawn out his silver ladle and flint striker. Sorticles was livid, grabbing him by the scuff of the neck like a gianni to toss him back into the street. Not however before he relieved the boy of his coin and tucked a new packet into the small pocket beneath his belt.

The scenario almost ran Lady Olivieta over when she arrived. Poor dear, she's had such a difficult time of things as it is. She was a three time widow, king's rest their souls. The first had taken a tumble from his tarn. Broken strap on the saddle and all. Had it waited a few moments more before it snapped he would have died instantly, instead he had lived shattered for almost two hands. The second and third mates expired under more mysterious circumstances. One choking on his own tongue, perhaps an allergic reaction to something he ate. The other seemed to have a latent respiratory disorder. He stopped breathing in the middle of the night. And now her latest mate was suffering from a spell of sleep apnea. It seemed neither could find peace in slumbers. Lady Olivieta had come for a sleeping potion. Such a worrisome little thing, she plied the healer with questions. How much is safe to give without worry of overdose? One? Ahh then she would take three, one never knew if it could get lost or one of the staff pilfer a packet.

I'd asked if she needed anything else. It was a petulant little sigh that came with the request. I was such a graceful little pretty. He would so enjoy having me serve tea.

sentiment rompu

compassion severed at its core
there is no remorse
watching the writhe of the last breath
breathed in rattling gasp
there is no ear for the whimpering
pleas to fall upon
no change of destiny
that will suddenly wake you
from your mare
make you inhale sharply
with quiet whispers
it was only a dream
it was only a dream
no fingertips response
that finds or offers mercy
along the life flow in an artery
only curiosity if it will bleed
as prettily as the one before
just a rhthym of pulse
a lullaby so maddeningly soothing
that I wish it to stop
the thundering
and the final snap
that brings silence with it
and peace
~hers

Feast

Gathering cradling
clutching with care
I held him close,
as close as I dare
I ran my fingers
through the dark mane
twirling a lock
around my fingers again
sliding it back
and tucking it tight
I cleared his vision,
I cleared his sight

All my words
caught on the tip of my tongue
my wants, my needs
remained my own
for this moment
this moment I live
I wanted to reach out
I wanted to give
the shivering creature
I held close to me
I curled him to my heart
to set him free

slit open my ribs
slit open my skin
into the warmth
I pressed him in
I held him tight,
I held him there
I fed him my blood,
his drink was my tears
I willed him to grow
I willed him to live
I begged him to take
all I could give

He drew in my breath
and he drew his strength
He unfurled, uncurled
and stretched his length
Within the womb
of my heart
and my soul
There he could thrive,
There he could grow bold
Make a feast
of my love
I cry without lament
make a banquet divine
For your nourishment

For now For ever

Devour me whole.

In the crevices

It would be my capabilities with a quill that helped fill in the gap of expenses for the opulence of our quarters. The old physician was pleased to see me again and assured Jelus I would be an asset to him in exchange for a few coins. The day went quickly with the constant comings and goings of patrons. The hushed tones like the chanting from within a temple were continuous. The passing of coin always secretive regardless of who could have seen a vial, an herb, the toss of a fetus into a bucket along with scarlet soaked reps.

The two books kept of accounts were updated with an ease. It did not take me long to memorize the entries of vitamin for the kanda or the sleeping powders in lieu of various poisons. When the bell on the door sounded the last time, Sorticles flipped the sign over and turned the key. The mild manner of the man had spun over as easily as the tumblers of the lock.

Lechery now burned in his eyes like a well filled lantern. The fumbling of the lacings came with difficulty by the gnarled old fingers. They began a rhthymic caress even before he approached, never lessening their grasp of his ardors. Age had not dampened the speed of which he set upon me. He was tender though with the press of his wrinkled mouth against the vee of my throat. The free hand touching the swell of one breast as if it were delicate enough to be fragile. I found myself pressed and my body buffeted against the ledgers on his desk for what seemed an endless few moments. It was a long acrid breath, a puddle of slack jawed drool on my chest and the close of his eyes that spoke of a journey well ended for him. In profuse apologies, the physician grabbed a roll of gauze to clean away the spill of his affections from his own thigh.

The professions of shame continued as he pressed extra coins into my palm for my use. A more stoic retort came afterward as he transformed once more to the business man I'd worked for throughout the day. He looked forward to seeing me tomorrow.

Those coins were poked into a crevice of loose bricks in the alley close to the apartment when I was sure no one was looking.

A window on the world

He had rented a small apartment, the furnishings of which were far more luxurious than the one I'd stayed in prior. It would never hold a candle to Caethlong but with a good scouring it had potential. It was only half block up from the previous insula and the little diner I remembered could be seen if one crooked their neck to an obscene angle.

I had my own room this time albeit only a few feet by a few feet in measure. One thread bare mat in its center to be the difference between sleeping on the floor itself. My 'room' had a window overlooking the alley and another opened to the street. This one adorned with curved bars that allowed the shutters to open but not allow strangers to scale the two floors below and creep within.

At night I would slip out onto the ledge with the kalika my keeper had given me. It was a gift for the bluish black marks left of wishing silence and finding it if it meant sealing off my breath. The elongated box was worn and scarred. The strings aged enough to need constant tightening to keep it in tune. But there on my little perch I would play the meloncholy songs of Acresius. The songs of Five, the ballads of Pent.

There I had a soul.

Iniquities

Iniquities


Shorl's weakness was avarice and in the end it had swallowed him whole and tied his fate off with purse strings. Dolht's wrath had laid him wide open and left him to rot in the alley only a few blocks from here. A smile painted obscenely beneath his chin with the edge of a blade as definition of irony.

Jelus was one of those men who had a taste for something else. The grace and beauty of a serve was lost to him with his want for someone bawdy and brash. In your face sexuality was brushed aside in want of vulnerability and demureness. He would spend much of his time in the alcoves, disgruntled that he was never pleased and demanding his coin back or in the paga dens with the same end result. Always something. Always something else.

This lust that he carried perhaps unknown even to himself would always leave him dis-satisfied with every thing in life. My hair was not blonde and it enraged him. My eyes were not brown which sent him to a fury. Each small nuance of difference than his ideal set the brakes on his enjoyments and rendered him impotent to thriving in any manner. I was the current scapegoat for his troubles. The more his world collapsed in around him, the more he would lash out. At last I'd asked if he would sell me if I was the bain of his existence. His answer was that I was not worth even a portion of a copper. I was useless. Still his grasp on my arm when we walked the crowded streets held me like a manacle of iron next to him.

My query became a pleading to let me go, allow me to work for enough coin then to buy my freedom from him, something, anything but release me. There was a flicker of weakness that streaked his features, his voice ... a terror in his eyes when he spoke quietly. He couldn't allow that, he wanted me.

Hold my Hand

Hold my hand


When I clone a human being
It will want to hold my hand
When I clone a human being
It will be a member of my band
Scientific method girl
The theorems speak to me
Measure out the chemicals
Safety goggles on my eyes
Turn the Bunsen burner on
My creation comes alive
I have cloned a human being
It is here and holds my hand

~Freezepop

XIII

I am XIII, the thirteeth creation of the thirteenth breeding cycle. A specific order made for an Ubar, a product of genetic creativity, in some clique's it is phrased intelligent design. It is a concept reputed in most cases as explanation for the universe itself though upon this world it is not so grandiose an ideal. Bred slaves can be had for as little as a few coppers. Most though do not wish to know the inner workings of such experiments. 'Just see to the order and send for me when it is done.'
Grisch and Aestheta were in essence my mother and father although we are all from the seed of Racselis himself. Some have called him genious. My own thoughts are that they have no imagining of the man's true abilities. Some call him a mad man. Those would be closer to the truth but not atributed to his skills.
I remember the underground laboratories of my maker. I remenber Racselis. I remember the Isle of Acresius, the World's End. I remember the beakers of my siblings and the vats that contained those that still breathed. Perfection is often a labored result of many erroneous attempts. The eyes of One better known as Alka, had a depth to them that you could stumble into and never find your way home. The liquid effect of her anatomy keeps her limited to amniotic fluids and for all the gelatinous consistency of her skin, she is in fact all heart. She was and will always be Aestheta's favored. Two sleeps in a jar on the top shelf. The tiny body no larger than my own hand carved from our mother's womb remains in stasis not because of the engorged elongated penis matched by a barbed appendage extending from the end of his nobby spine but because he had the misfortune of being male. Five, so beautiful .. too beautiful for words was rendered mute when they cut out her tongue. Her siren's song crafting such despair that the weight of it urged half the staff to suicide before she was silenced. There were others, pallid aberrations, deviances, atrophies, vistigial creatures that the world does not wish to know of.
Myself? Nothing that is complete breathes.
I was made in the image of my creator. Not the design of my features, not the essence of my existence. Find what question Racselis answered in forming me in his likeness or rather what question he asked. Find why he stood back and proclaimed that I was exquisite and you will find my purpose.
I am said to be all that a man desires. In truth I am merely an uncalculating predator created to feast on lusts ... passions ... weaknesses, whatever they may be.

Imperfect Circle

Had it all come half circle once more to the bowels of Ar? It would stand to reason. Where else could you hide a stolen slave so brazenly in public and think to get away with it?
I knew it by its smell alone and with the sordid fragrances of urine, urt feces, spilled paga and the tang of cum was an odd sense that I'd come home.
The card the freewoman of many colors had long since been lost but as the guard herded me along the busy streets I looked for her. I remember the feel of the image that had been painted on the small announcement, the one of the laughing corpse. I could still feel the texture beneath my thumb.
From beneath the dark hood of the cloak I'd been allowed to wear I watched a face now and then. It wasn't so much expectancy to see the actress or the beautiful faced boy I had met outside the insula. It was simply seeking familiarity. My impassiveness otherwise kept my keeper's hand latched to my forearm. The not so gentle jerks to keep me closer to his side allowed a glimpse of the ivory flesh and the contrast of the golden sirik of my ankle to be seen. His growl was for his own benefit. I did not care.
What happens in the Anbar District stays in the Anbar District.